Reid Harris Cooper (lordrexfear) wrote,
Reid Harris Cooper
lordrexfear

Stuffed Collection

You probably aren't aware of this, but I have a really extensive collection of plush and stuffed animals and other such creatures. I'm not talking about teddy bears and that ilk, I'm talking some really wild and crazy stuff. I'm talking about a realistic looking elephant standing about 2 and and a half feet tall. I also have a bunch of other elephants. One actually does an elephant noise when squeezed, another is just super fluffy and cute.

On top of the elephants though there are many things on this bed of mine. I think you might laugh at me and also get flabbergasted by the following list of stuffed things I own that share my bed:
A banana with a face
A mini Scooby-Doo
Snoopy from Peanuts
Wishbone (who happens to actually look like my second dog)
my former dog Wonton R.I.P.
a walrus
a thirty year old Kermit the Frog
Berkely Breathed's Bill the Cat (THHHPTTT!)
a dog that looks like my current dog Domino that I owned BEFORE we got Domino
my dog Domino
Homer and Marge Simpson
Simba from The Lion King
Big the Cat from Sonic the Hedgehog
Andy Runton's Owly

As you can see my stuffed animal collection is as pop-culturally rampant as my mind... video games, cartoons, movies, real dogs, tv shows, puppets and comics. Notice one particular pop-culture reference I tend to hit upon a lot missing though? Well... wait.

I have even more than that list, many more... including Morty The Monkey.

Morty is a hand puppet with no nose. I've owned Morty for many years... since I was a kid, probably since I was 3 or 4. As a teenager though Morty became way more than just a hand puppet. He became a character in fiction that I wrote. Competitive fiction, much like LJ Idol. This competitive fiction though revolved around fantasy wrestling leagues though. In these leagues we created our own wrestlers with their own move sets, gimmicks, styles and stories.

One of the feds I joined that I loved the most though was an all comedy fed, one where the most ridiculous, over the top, silly wrestler you could come up with was relished upon.

My creation was Fred Nomiddleorlastname. Fred was a huge country bumpkin who believed that the monkey puppet on his hand by the name of Morty was alive and Morty was the wrestler. Fred was just his friend and handler. If Fred went for a chokeslam, Morty was performing a bodyslam or a powerbomb or a suplex or whatever. A punch was a dropkick or a headscissors... you get the idea. I got a big kick out of writing my Morty promos. I got to go into the deepest places of my mind and come up with some really stupid things. I loved it. I know somewhere on a disc all those old Morty promos exist, but let's pretend that Morty was being interviewed today about his time as a wrestler. What would he say?

[We open on a farm on the outskirts of some Nebraska town. Standing by a fence is a large gruff man with a white beard standing over seven feet tall. Sitting on the fence is what appears to be a monkey puppet with no nose being held up by the man's left hand. The camera closes up on the monkey puppet and while the voice we hear obviously comes from the large man, out of respect and fear we shall pretend the monkey is talking.]

MORTY: I WAS A WRESTLER!

Fred Nomiddleorlastname: Id's true, he was a chimp too.

MORTY: A CHAMP! I WON A CHIMPIONSHIP! THE CHIMP CHAMP! THAT WAS ME!

Fred: I helped.

MORTY: SHUT UP! I HAD NO HELP! I WAS AWESOME AND WON! ALL THE TIME! I NEVER LOST! I DON'T THINK I LOST! DID I LOSE? FRED? DID I?

Fred: You tol' me to shut it.

MORTY: OKAY, YOU CAN LEAVE NOW! I DONT' EVEN KNOW WHO I AM ANYMORE! MARTY? I'M MARTY FROM THAT MOVIE RIGHT? LIVED WITH HIS MOM? FAT OLD DUDE! MARTY! YEAH! THAT WAS ME! LEAVE ME ALONE! I'M OLD!

[The camera pans away as we see Fred shakes his head, sigh and toss Morty into a corner as he cries and slumps into a hay stack.]

Oh and here's Morty to end things:
a photo of Morty the Monkey

for [lj idol second chance] Topic 5: Softness
Tags: ljidol
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